Turning 30

Anticipation.  This would best describe what I’ve been feeling these past few years.  We all have dreams of how we want our lives to be.  As I turn 30, I cannot help but evaluate where I am in my life.  Is where I am right now where I imagined myself to be?

I remember setting life goals.  Particularly what I would accomplish by the age of 30.  I pictured myself having a self-sustaining business and my own family.  This became my measuring stick for success.  If this was still my basis, I would have failed terribly.  Despite not having these things at this point in my life, I can without a doubt say I am exactly where I am supposed to be.

While it is necessary to plan for our lives and work hard for it, a big part of the outcome is beyond our control.  No matter how ready we may think we are, some things can only be brought about by time.  I have responded with these “delays” with frustration, hopelessness and inadequacy.  This made me question my life’s purpose. Making me wonder if I am just chasing fantasies. It is only in running to God with the cries of my heart did I start to look at things at a different light.

I learned that accomplishments is just a small piece in the grand scheme of things.  Beyond the world’s definition of success, which isn’t guaranteed to last, it is important to build character.  Character is only something that can be forged through time, failures and set-backs.  Patience is something that I had to learn, it wasn’t easy and it is still a continuous learning process.  While I want things to go my own way, learning to wait and trust God is teaching me how to be humble.  Waiting doesn’t mean being idle, it is moving forward and being productive in every area of our lives.  By doing so, yet another character is being built: perseverance.  The Bible says:


Let perseverance finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything. (James 1:4 NIV)

In retrospect, the character that is being built is developing maturity in my life.  And this is something that can never be taken away.  Though doubts more often than not fill my heart and mind, causing me to second guess myself and my purpose.  I have to fix my eyes on God and anchor my hope in Him.  I know one day all my dreams will come to pass and I will have the wisdom and the right attitude in handling it. When that time comes, I can be a blessing to others beyond just being blessed.