Doing As I Do

As my kids get older, the more I realise a powerful yet equally challenging truth: my kids do as I do, not so much as I say. If I tell my kids to be kind but respond to them unkindly, they will most likely learn to be unkind. If I tell my kids to be patient, but act impatiently towards them, guess what they will pickup? Impatience. In the same way, if I show them a good example, they'll most likely follow that lead.

This is why it's so important to me to teach and show them what's right and what's wrong.

The world can be a confusing place for a kid with all the mixed messages he or she gets. Most of the world makes money, cars, things, fame, and human recognition the most important things, but we know from the Bible that these things are not only fleeting but harmful when turned into obsessions. I don't want my kids to care more about cars than they do about the drivers. I don't want them so impressed with the size of a house that they forget the household help. And I realised that left to normal influences they'll think that things are more important than people, and when they don't get their way, they won't treat others properly. I have to show them that people are way more valuable than any material thing - and this I can only teach through lessening my own materialism, showing them kindness, treating people who serve us generously, and displaying the attitudes I teach. There's no other way. Kids are too smart to fall for cheap words. They'll pick-up what they see.

If I want to teach my kids the value of money and hard work, they need to see me working hard, persevering, saving, not taking short-cuts, or using others. I want to show them that hard work isn't bad, and that working on something is a rewarding thing. I'm grateful Coco Cakes allows me to do that and is business we're all proud of.

This is also why the influences on my kids, their friends and who I call my friends, are important. I want to be able to tell my kids to follow this man's example, or this is how a lady should behave, or this is the kind of humility that we should pray for. It's so easy for them to get blinded by status and what's cool for now.

As many of you know, I'm a single mom. Many people ask me, "How are you able to balance everything?" I tell them that I can't, that I'm thankful to God for His help and for really surrounding me with people who have helped me in the areas I lack. I'm so grateful for the wiser people who have advised me. I'm so grateful for those who help me with Coco Cakes, and for those who have helped me in the past. A lot of what I'm doing is new, and it's such a great feeling to feel real support, and to see people acting out their love. It's really taught me so much on how I should treat others too.

I really want to teach them, to show them, that people, even those others treat lowly, should be treated with dignity.

Among the different things I want to teach my kids, teaching them to put others first is one of the top. I know this isn't always easy to train in a materialistic and "me-first" world, but I know I have a chance if I do it myself and show them how.